Tag Archives: scripting

Auto-Andrew and being Half-Here

Posted on by
I was reading some blogs just now and then half way through one of these blogs I realized “oh, I am not actually reading this blog” Have you ever noticed that with yourself when your only “Half Here” when you are reading something and just skimming through it. What A fuck up. I mean if I am going to read something I may as well actually read the thing, no point in just skimming over it to “get it done” which was what I was doing. I also wanted to write this blog, and was separating myself into multiple places at once instead of being completely Here within the single point I am directing. So first I will right this then, go back and read, and give myself the proper time and give that which I am reading my complete attention so I actually do read it, from the perspective of not separating myself into multiple places at once but being Here with myself as I read. Interesting that this way of only “Half Reading” something has become so normal that I don’t even notice when I am doing it from the perspective of not realizing or seeing that I am in fact not really reading but just skimming my eyes over the information. Another point that has been ‘bothering’ me today is my typing skills. I have been typing quite sloppy in my typing and not directing each finger to hit each letter in its correct placement but rather letting the hands just kind of type the words by themselves which cause me to have to go back and make many corrections, so rather thus, Be Here in typing. And Direct each letter as I type. So just some corrections in reading and typing to support myself to Be Here within my world so that it is Me Here in Full Awareness Directing myself so that I am not just running on AutoAndrew   Fuck I even noticed this “AutoAndrew” today also while driving, and I mean that is when accidents happen, when one is not completely here and completely present with self while driving. So noticed a few instances of this today where I have become ‘accustomed’ to a certain experience of myself, that I have come to accept. However this ‘experience’ which I have become ‘used to’ is not such that I am Here and fully present, directive and aware of my environment or myself. So I must flagPoint this.   So the point here is to identify / flagpoint this “normal self” which has become the dominant self in my day to day activities, and to assist and support myself to Stop myself from existing on auto pilot or only being half here, and assisting and supporting myself to identify when this occur and to stop and correct myself from the perspective of ensuring I am Fully Here, within and as Full Self Awareness in the Moment. And ensure that it is me here that is moving/directing my body, and that I am aware of my each and every movement, and each step that I take and make sure that I am the one taking each step and that I am not just on auto pilot. So to assist and support myself to become aware of each and every movement I make within my day, and make sure I am HERE within and as each and every movement/moment. And within this Stop participating / living in the mind, as thoughts, daydreams, pictures, emotions and feelings. And support me to bring through Me as Self Awareness, Self Presence Here in each and every breath. So that a New Me Emerge who is Actually Self Aware and Here in each and every breath and who directs oneself in the best interest of ALL.    

New Job – Preparation

Posted on by
Before I begin writing this I am going to remind myself here, that what I write, is me. And that what I write becomes me. And what I write becomes my inner structure, and therefore to effectively support myself by writing an inner structural support that Stand as what is best for ALL, and that creates a functionally effective human being within the context of what I am currently facing , what I will be facing and where we are going in process in terms of bringing forth equality, an equal money system, a world that is best for all, and a human being that is dignified, self respected, trustworthy, and self honest. So today I met with my new boss to go over some details of the Job I will be doing this summer, which is Landscaping. I experience excitement and anticipation to “get into the swing of things”, and noticed all sorts of questions coming up inside me that really are only able to be answered in time as I walk the process of the job and see what it is all about, and see where I am effective, and particularly see where I will require to breath and support myself to strengthen my resolve in certain areas. I see one area where this will be required is “afterwork” as the job I will be doing I expect to be quite physical and thus one usually is quite ‘tired’ after work, and so may have to breathe in these moments to be able to continue effectively participating within my written work and desteni process stuff. Other than that I at the moment simply require patients and not get ahead of myself. So Just breath and focus on remaining here and not going into my mind at this stage and creating imaginary worlds of what all will happen in the future to the point of creating anxiety inside of myself. I am looking forwards to the job, and also getting a more consistent routine in place and have money coming in. We have a SnowFall warning tonight for the next day or so, so my “ Snow Removal” job may be going out with a Bang Here, or rather...A Flurry!