Tag Archives: eqafe

Exposing Unnecessary Fears in my Day to Day Living.

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Tonight after work later in the evening I noticed a part of the text that my boss sent me earlier in the day before I had left from work that I did not give direction to. Fear immediately came up within me and my entire experience of myself shifted in that moment from being fine to suddenly being uncomfortable and possessed by the fear related to this point. There was a few different aspects to the fear. I forgot to properly cover up some bags of cement before rain had started to fall and to confirm that that was cool before I left for the day. The rain had already been falling for about 6.5 hours before I noticed that I missed this point so the damage could have already been done. A question that came up within me is, “Is it necessary to participate in this fear that I immediately went into / became possessed by” in that moment of realizing this missed point? The point that I see is no. There should never be any reason why one should accept and allow oneself to exist within fear. No matter what reason I looked at in terms of why I was actually going into fear; they simply were not valid for me to put myself through that experience instead of  letting the experience of fear go. The physical reality facts is still the way it is. It is more a matter of letting go of the fear attached to that scenario. This does not mean that I don't have to be practically responsible for my reality, it just mean that if I make a mistake I support myself to stop all self judgement related to the point and rather just focus on what is required to be directed practically. To fear about it does not fix it or actually make it worse or better. So then what is the purpose of the fear, and is it necessary? This event also showed me how simple it is for one to overlook or skip-over something that is required to be practically done and how that one tiny point could have quite a big consequence. Today’s point would have literally taken me 2 minutes to direct and in not doing this could have let allot of valuable resources and material get ruined. I did not ignore the point, I simply forgot. So this event showed me that I am able to be more specific and thorough within my moment to moment application. Also within this I see that even within the context of this event there is no valid justification for me to “go into fear” or Self Judgement, no matter what the stakes. Fear does not support me at all. The experience of existing in fear is not a cool experience at all and thus there is no reason why I should accept and allow myself to do this to myself. So yes, this event today brought up this point in relation to fear where I have been looking recently at my own experience of myself and that often my experience of me is not that pleasant and yet, it is me doing it to myself, and so investigating why I would accept and allow me to put myself through experiences within and as self that is really not cool, because that is backwards. Refusing to let go of an experience that is causing allot of discomfort. So I have been investigating this and working on actually letting go of these experiences of fear that is really not necessary to be in. So there is just a few aspects that came up today.

2012: Earth Hour – 147 Countries prove Global Ignorance Towards Life.

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Its Earth Hour! Earth hour is an event that takes place every year on the last Saturday in March where this year a total of 147 countries are participating in “going dark for an hour” where people are encouraged to turn off their lights for one hour; the event is a Global Effort to highlight climate change. I have a question Will we just keep having Earth Hour every single year? How come we are not implementing a solution so that this event become non-existent? From my perspective one should in fact be absolutely aware in every moment how ones participation in that moment actually form a relationship with the planet and what affects and consequences that relationship has on the planet. The fact that we have such a thing like “Earth Hour” is showing that we have in fact completely lost touch with the earth we live on (if we ever had it) and are unaware of how the way we live is affecting and influencing what is here. Or put another way - We are unaware of how what we do, creates what is here. We must Stop accepting and allowing ourselves to continue existing in such abuse and neglect towards ourselves and our planet and start taking responsibility for ourselves / what is here / our creation. This has been a process for me to start seeing and understanding “how to live” so to speak. And that we as humanity have essentially lost ourselves in the world we have created for ourselves and have given up on even trying to find a solution. We have completely accepted ourselves as limited in our ability of who we are as life and what we are capable of. I see this within myself from the perspective of even being able to fathom the point of it being possible to exist in every moment where one is absolutely aware of how ones actions affect the earth we live on. Before I would have thought there to be no way to actually do this. In a way, I understood this point but did not see myself capable of actually being able to become this where I am in fact aware of the earth in every moment so to speak. Does this not simply suggest a point of Self Awareness? I see that I have drawn allot lines and thus limitations upon myself with regards to what I am capable of. Now its a process of stopping accepting and allowing myself to limit myself in anyway and rather to push myself to a point of total self awareness. I understand how this is necessary to end the abuse that we have accepted to take place in this world. Where in I take responsibility for “my every moment” and make sure that my actions in that single moment accumulate into that which is best for all. Or Accumulate into Support, instead of what we have now where our actions and behaviours are actually accumulating into abuse and degradation of the planet and ourselves as life. Hence Global Warming or Wars or Poverty and all the other abusive shit that takes place on this planet. What I also see is that I first must begin with myself. Where in I stop my own abusive behaviours / relationships and thus when I am living in every moment as actual Support of Life than this is how we individually each do our part to support the emergence of a planet that actually exist in Dignity. I have found this to be quite a process from the perspective of the vastness of self and how extensive I have accepted and allowed myself to establish abusive behaviours within and without. I have been walking this process of developing self awareness along side Desteni and other Destonians. The Desteni material has been invaluable in assisting and supporting me to understand myself and how I am actually functioning where I am able to actually start seeing how I able to take responsibility for and as myself In Every Moment! There is endless material available on the desteni.org site as well as the equalmoney.org site. You can also find countless desteni videos on youtube or take actual Lessons designed to support you to walk your process of self realization self awareness at desteniiprocess.com Another cool point for those that are curious is to explore Eqafe.com where there is more “exclusive” material and interviews that one is able to purchase to support desteni and support yourself. Ok but getting back to the Earth Hour Point... Placing our attention on the Earth for once a year for one single hour is obviously not enough. We must incorporate earth hour into our Every Single Moment for it to be effective. Where in each moment we ask ourselves the question - Is my actions/expression in this moment supporting the continued abuse of the planet or is it practically supporting a change to stop the abuse that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to inflict on Ourselves and The Earth. So rather than simply spend one hour every year considering this point, I see that this must become an “in every moment” consideration to actually bring forth a solution. Where this become a point of our general awareness of ourselves where we are actually aware of how our actions affect our environment. And thus ensure that our actions do not have a flow out domino affect that support the abuse and destruction of the planet. desteni.org. desteniiprocess.com equalmoney.org eqafe.com

Ok, Stop putting off Blogging.

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I have been putting off blogging for a while this month. I Haven’t really known what to blog about but see that this is more related to how I am applying myself in my process, meaning when I am not applying myself and actually working with myself within writing, self forgiveness and self correction there usually is “nothing to write about” where when I am more working with myself it is easier to write blogs. I got a speeding ticket today. That’s the first one I have gotten since starting driving here in the city a couple years ago. There was actually a point of relief within me just to get it over with where now I have finally gotten a ticket and can stop wondering when and if I will get one.  (lol) I had just left my house and was heading out get a coffee. When I got the ticket I was actually “talking out” point about this new phone I got and basically I was looking at this point where since buying the phone  I was finding myself to be very distracted and divided within myself so was looking at what the ‘F’ is going on that when I got this phone suddenly my world is just not stable so I was debating/deciding whether or not to return it as being a possible solution for me to just stabilize myself again...and then I see the flashing lights of the police car. When I got the ticket I actually did not react to much. I was driving 82 in a 60 zone. I found though that getting the ticket pushed me more to have a look at what the fuck is going on with myself in my world. I mean having this whole experience with my phone and experiencing myself as quite disoriented and divided this week, and now to get pulled over by the police and get a speeding ticket, its just like WTF. I really gotta have a serious look at “what’s the point” I decided after I got the ticket “Fuck-It. I will return the phone.” Turns out I can’t because I already used it more than 15 minutes. I actually didn’t want to return it but was kind of stuck in this point of seeing that my instability was somehow related to me getting this phone so just decided to go ahead and see about returning it. After getting home from not being allowed to return my phone I started writing. I usually write each day but some days my writing is not much and does not really do anything, but these events today in a way pushed me to actually write out some of the points that was busy swirling around inside myself and see if I could support myself to stabilize myself in by directing myself to “get in there” more with my writing. I found I was a bit more stable after writing and once again see the invaluable support that writing can be as a tool to support oneself in ones day to day living. I have not blogged much this month and so can even see a link between this point and the instability within myself that had come up this last week. Both in relation to simply not giving myself the opportunity to stabilize myself within writing and also due to having things pile up and pile on top of each other when you procrastinate in doing something where I this point of fear start to emerge within me about “oh no, will I have enough time to get my blogs done this month” instead of just having directed the point so that it is more of an expression instead of an obligation which occur when one procrastinates. Ok I will leave you with a practical support video giving some perspective on what one can expect or sometimes encounter with regards to facing ones world and getting things done.   Time Management – Walking In Space Time Physical-Breath http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNuhdunb1qs&feature=plcp&context=C3b75e47UDOEgsToPDskK_IqYzluqQVsuv1PHniQh-

The “New Years Resolution Attitude” Towards Self Change.

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Today I watched the video “ How Thoughts Create Physical Reality”. This is one of the many support videos that have been uploaded by Desteni as practical support videos to assist and support one to change / transform self and this world. And also initially to give one the opportunity to start understanding and have some actual insight into what it actually means to Change Self The point  I wanted to mention here is about our/humanities current perception and understanding of what Self Change is, which one is able to see within the point of the “NewYears Resolution” As I watched this video today (how thoughts create physical reality)  I was thinking to myself  “how is one actually supposed to change if they do not have the understanding which this video placed into perspective/context, in part along with all the other desteni videos/material and the entire desteni process, including the desteni i process courses, all of which is basically focused on the point of Self Change. This process of self change being in essence a 24/7 application that a being take on for oneself within seeing realizing the extent of dedication required to walk the point of self change. And not just reduce this point of self change into a momentary "nice idea" as a News Years Resolution type approach to changing self. So, it just makes me think about all of those NewYears Resolutions being made out there right now at the moment in preparation for the new year and changing self into a “better person” The Point of the New Years Resolution actually show at the moment our current  limited understanding as humanity of what it actually means / implies to change self. Where one can go literally the entire year without giving this point any attention to then attempt to add it into there lives as a new years resolution - It is really just like making the point of change just another fad like everything else in this consumer culture world. Lol - Next there will be an "App" for that - The instachange app - lol Instead of self change being  understood as a  day to day application of self, walked in dedication and willingness to give up 'who self has become' in order to recreate self, it has become a momentary application that only comes around once a year where there is this kind of build up of energy and one get all excited and decide to make a change in their life, but have very little practical understanding or context of what it is really going to take to change self and further more the degree of change which is in fact required in this world to create a world that is best for all, a world that is actually dignified to live in. So I suggest anyone serious about following through with your NewYears Resolution check out this video  “ How Thoughts Create Physical Reality” to get some perspective on how we have actually come to create ourselves as human beings as this will give some indication of what is actually required to change and transform self; and obviously to support self to realize that life should in fact be a consistent dedicated walking of self change and not just some fad that you can try out once in a year for a month or so as a “New Years Resolution” For information regarding the process of self change visit desteni.org To join the Desteni I Process visit desteniiprocess.com For Self Supportive Merchandise and Products visit Eqafe.com Featured Eqafe Product  

Writing as Self Support – My Fingers have a mind of their Own.

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Ok, I am going to pick up on a point that I came across while writing last night which was the point of directing myself in relation to energy from the perspective of “energy” and “experience” of self, being the starting point of self movement. For some context Here is a quote by Bernard Poolman: “your real life on earth move by actual breath as time --from the first breath to the last breath - and breath determines the effectiveness of living on earth. The less you are aware of breathing, the more you will live in a system world where life is not honored and things like money will drive you. The more you live by breathing as timekeeper, the more you will notice the kazillions of nonhuman beings on earth.” So with regards to the point I mentioned above, this quote by Bernard Poolman offers a context for how one “should” direct and move self – That being rather by/within breath instead of as/within the mind as energy. Basically what I was looking at last night was that how there always seemed to be a kind of “anxiety” within myself that pushes me in this direction or that. Within this I found I was much less effective in what I was doing due to what I was doing being subject to this anxiety/energy/experience of myself that constantly push me and influence my moment to moment expression as living application. This point actually showed itself this morning as well as I sat down in front of the computer to write. I was simply sitting down to write as a point of self support. To just direct myself to write as a way to support me to start being able to see myself and become more aware of myself where in writing is a tool to develop self awareness and also self stability. Self stability from the perspective of supporting myself to slow down within and as myself and not spend all my time existing in the mind or in some experience of myself that is influencing me where I end up feeling like I am just along for the ride with no directive principle at all, with no ability to be deliberate and specific and directive within my expression what ever I might be doing, because there is this kind of force pushing/forcing me along and in this I end up skipping over things and rushing things and not being as specific and deliberate as I could and thus within a greater context end up creating and manifesting my world from the starting point of skipping over things, rushing and not being specific – thus this has implications that flow out into the very creation of my life/world/ as my immediate surroundings as well as the world as a whole – lol...Ok getting back to the point. Today as I sat down to write, I shot “out of the gates” like a race horse blasting towards the finish line. My fingers hardly keeping up. It wasn’t long before I lost track of what I was writing and everything became like one long drone or run on sentence where I experienced me as not really supporting myself in the writing anymore due to this point of feeling a bit “out of control” like my fingers and what I was writing had a mind of its own. So this is showing me that how I am more existing in mind in my world and that when I go to write, the mind attempt to assert itself as the governing principle of me – though what I have found is that the tool of writing supports in stabilization of self in by supporting the slowing down of self even though initially “out of the gates” or in other situations the mind attempt to position itself as the dominant directive principle, so yes, it will not be an automatic correction but like anything I see simply requires consistent application for effective support. This reminds me of a conversation I had with Bernard while I was in South Africa. This conversation was quite long, somewhere between 1 and 2 hours. During the discussion one of the points that was mentioned was how when I speak it’s like within myself my mind races way ahead and I end up trying to keep up with mind and in this my communication is not effective. I always enjoy seeing people who are very stable in their communication where they are “Here” within each breath as each word they speak and their mind is not just racing a mile a minute inside themselves going all different directions, but rather it is like they are stable and here and silent. In this their communication is much more effective and stable. So in essence this morning I see the point was “my mind” racing a mile a minute, and instead of stopping and slowing myself down, I ended up initially getting caught up with trying to chase down my mind or keep up with mind as it just races all over the place. For me that is one of the points in using writing as a tool to support me – The point being to assist and support myself to slow down and stabilize myself within me. So I am not constantly running around in my mind. And so in writing I can take the opportunity to slow myself and make sure I am not running/chasing after the mind but that I am here and specific and directive in the placement of my words. So will see how this develops – it has been a point that I have been working with since I started process – which is cool in itself because before process I had never even herd a practical description of this experience that was happening inside myself to be able to support me to even know where to begin to correct the point and become more effective in my communication and writing – So yes, the point I work with is stopping the mind/energy and rather writing from the perspective of being here as Breath. To reference again, this time a segment of the above quote by Bernard Poolman: “The less you are aware of breathing, the more you will live in a system world where life is not honored and things like money will drive you.” So when I started writing this morning I was not aware of my breathing and ended up being directed by the “system world” where I am “driven” by points other than Self.  Which is what I started this document off by writing about – This point I came across last night which was how I was seeing that I always seem to directed or influenced or moving myself in relation to some energy or experience of myself and rarely am I simply here directing myself within and as breath as a point of Self Direction – Self direction does not require energy or experience or some kind of anxiety to push self to move, but is rather Self moving, directing self as a Self Expression. So I can just continue to support myself through writing and developing the point of slowing down and also identifying such moments when I end up “trapped” within my mind, within the system world and being directed by this where there is like this kind of energy pushing and influencing me like pushing me through something instead of me just walking through a point breath by breath with no urge or pressure experience within myself to quickly get to the finish line.   Links: 2012 - New 21 Day Breathing Challenge - Interview done on utilizing breath as practical self support Desteni I Process - Self Development and Leadership Course Desteni.org   Support Products and Merchandise available now at the EQAFE.COM   Freedom Blogs  - Read Blogs by many destonians who have dedicated themselves to practical self support through writing regularly on various differen       No 1. Beginners - Thoughts, Writings, and Self Forgiveness - Covering here the basic points that self will face as one’s Conscious, Subconscious and Unconscious Mind in initially starting walking one’s process of facing the Mind as self