Tag Archives: destonian

New Job – Preparation

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Before I begin writing this I am going to remind myself here, that what I write, is me. And that what I write becomes me. And what I write becomes my inner structure, and therefore to effectively support myself by writing an inner structural support that Stand as what is best for ALL, and that creates a functionally effective human being within the context of what I am currently facing , what I will be facing and where we are going in process in terms of bringing forth equality, an equal money system, a world that is best for all, and a human being that is dignified, self respected, trustworthy, and self honest. So today I met with my new boss to go over some details of the Job I will be doing this summer, which is Landscaping. I experience excitement and anticipation to “get into the swing of things”, and noticed all sorts of questions coming up inside me that really are only able to be answered in time as I walk the process of the job and see what it is all about, and see where I am effective, and particularly see where I will require to breath and support myself to strengthen my resolve in certain areas. I see one area where this will be required is “afterwork” as the job I will be doing I expect to be quite physical and thus one usually is quite ‘tired’ after work, and so may have to breathe in these moments to be able to continue effectively participating within my written work and desteni process stuff. Other than that I at the moment simply require patients and not get ahead of myself. So Just breath and focus on remaining here and not going into my mind at this stage and creating imaginary worlds of what all will happen in the future to the point of creating anxiety inside of myself. I am looking forwards to the job, and also getting a more consistent routine in place and have money coming in. We have a SnowFall warning tonight for the next day or so, so my “ Snow Removal” job may be going out with a Bang Here, or rather...A Flurry!

Moving Through Self Doubt – Remaining Here and Sticking to the Physical

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I experienced some doubt coming up today. This ‘doubt’ I experienced was in relation to the current project I am working on with regards to doing Logo Design. I have started with making my own Logo and have enjoyed the process of this and have been working on this now for quite some time, probably over 60 hours so far over a period of around a month. I had/have it at a stage which I am satisfied I can start placing, but then when I opened the file today and looked at it, I judged it and was not satisfied anymore and experienced a drop within myself because I was so close to having this ready to go and start to be able to walk the next stage of the preparation phase which is to place an add on my local job listings site advertising the service at a discount rate from the perspective of simply attracting some projects where I can “gain experience” or rather “fine tune my process” as this sounds ‘safer’ to the client, and so yes place it as a “special Limited time offer”. But today when I looked again at my Logo I was not entirely satisfied and even considered another “re-design” which is like much time and effort and so I experienced this point of Self Doubt coming up, like “this is never going to work”. I experienced a point of failure as an energetic experience of failing in the centre of my solar plexus / chest and experienced myself giving up. Other points also emerged as I continued to research this point on the internet to see how I will place all the points, and so as I researched began to doubt myself around my experience level. So the correction Here is to stick to the physical. Ok so I have gotten to a stage where it is not going “as planned” based on my desire which is my energetic projection of how I want it to go, and because the actual physical movement and my energetic projection did not align I went into this experience of “Oh it will never work” though I see the Key is simply to remain HERE. And to just keep walking the physical points. Focusing on the physical direction of the point. I see that this is a cycle, and I am in the “low point” or the stage of the cycle where I would “give in” as going into a point of depression for a while and then eventually starting up with the point again. So rather not go into these cycles. These cycles can go and play themselves out if they want but I will be there. I will be Here directing myself in the physical, so it is irrelevant what energy does as the point is to remain Here. I fell on this point last time and had a little mini collapse and gave up. So cool to see that it is exactly the same point as before clarifying even further that it is in fact just an energetic cycle. So breath, remain Here and direct myself in the physical and do not pay attention to the experience of myself of “not being able to do it” of “doubting myself” I mean in practical common sense, I haven’t actually even tested the point yet so have no actual real feed-back that it is not going to work. But rather just having an experience of doubt. So yes I must stick to Here, and not go into positive or negative energy charges about what may or may not happen, because I see that the only real indication of how things are going must be measured in the physical and so will stick to this and continue to move the physical points as they are still here to be moved/directed.

Retirement, Pensions and Equal Money For ALL

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Read the Article Here: Bill to end mandatory retirement “A bill that once seemed poised to sweep away legislated mandatory retirement in Canada is losing political steam following objections from Canadian businesses and labour organizations” I read an article in today’s paper about proposed legislature in Canada aimed at allowing individuals to work past the Mandatory retirement age. The reason for the Mandatory retirement age is to give federal employers a way to “manage some older workers with dignity with regard to diminishing performance resulting from advancing age.” Now obviously this entire Subject is Loaded with layers of deception from the perspective of how we have created a world and a world system that has complete disregard for life which is shown through how Our system is set up in such a way where when one reach a certain age within this world they essentially become irrelevant as the system is not set up or structured to include people past a certain age as they no longer can keep up with the pace that the system Is moving and are thus “moved aside” in this case by LAW where they are essentially forced to retire once they reach a certain age. This showing how in fact the system is not actually considering "all-of-itself" as All-Life, from birth to death but rather is set up to effectively render an individual “Dead” (to the system anyways) somewhere between the ages of 50 and 60. I find it fucking absurd and God dam delusional, pardon my French, that an individual has to pay an amount of their salary into a retirement fund for when they are older basically preparing themselves for “their retirement” which is actually preparing themselves to live out the rest of their lives in a World System that does not give a fuck about them and in fact still attempts to suck them dry even after they retire. Its like it is more difficult to actually exist within this world as you get older, yet as you get older your are more and more ignored and displaced by the system - its complete fucking reverse. This is truly one messed up world people. I suggest you all start seeing this because this is not a way to accept our reality, to continue going along with it as if it is just the way it is supposed to be. What about those that did not have an effective job within their lives – what about their retirement fund?…yaaaa, I guess its just too bad for them, your right – Fuck them. Who really cares about them anyways, as long as I have my future set, thank GOOOD for that, then there is not much I can do about them. Oh what a pity. Bullshit – We can no longer accept and allow such statements, such ignorance, such limitations of ourselves to simply believe that there is nothing that can be done. Well there is something that can be done. So before you accept such statements as the one above I suggest you consider re-considering what you have decided about how this world works and that things are just the way they are. At Desteni We Are Proposing a World Equality System which include as Equal Money System as a Solution. Within an Equal Money System one will be supported with a basic income from birth to death, essentially this means that one will not have to worry about a retirement fund, as this will be already placed for them when they are born as the basic income they will receive from birth to death. I mean look at how this will entirely change the complete existence of a human beings life. Never having to worry about money, never having to worry about having enough for when they retire but rather existing within a system, within a world which is based on equality, and what is best for all, where the being can actually walk within a point of Trusting the System to provide the necessary support for them and actually being able to relax and enjoy their life instead of fearing for there life. No more existing in constant fear resonating within them. This alone will likely extend the life expectancy of an individual as the Constant and Continuous stress placed on them by money will be completely non-existent within living in an Equal Money System. Imagine living in a world without that stress and the benefits of that on ones heal and life. So this will require some re-education so to speak, so that the system will in fact be a reflection of our inner selves, and right now our inner selves are actually quite ugly and require to be sorted out. If you are interested in an equal money system and understanding how to actually transform yourself into a point which actually is able to practically place heaven on earth suggest to investigate equal money system at www.equalmoney.org as well as “Desteni I Process” http://www.desteniiprocess.com as the practical equality education platform to assist and support oneself to stand up for life and bring forth a world that is best for all. www.equalmoney.org http://www.desteniiprocess.com

Opening Up a Reaction To SRA – Daily Blogging.

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Ok so a point came up today when listening to one of the latest points with regards to the direction of SRA and Desteni I Process. The point was that some of the ‘groups’ would be now “going back” to do Mind Constructs for another 6 months! I emphasise this as 6 months I see as quite a long time. And also the option was open for anyone really who wants to go back and do Mind Constructs for another 6 months. So I reacted to this point as follows. As I was not clear whether my group was required to go back or not I then saw that this would then be a decision that I would make from the perspective of being self-honest within the point and going back to do another 6 months of Mind Constructs so that I can effectively prepare myself to be and effective buddy where I am able to effectively support another through walking with them through their mind constructs from beginning to end. I see that I want to be effective with this point, and to have a solid foundation and understanding of doing Mind Constructs. So from this perspective yes of course it would be a cool support to do another 6 months of mind constructs. Initially I thought everybody would be stopping and doing the 6 months of mind constructs which was cool. I was fine with this. Though it turns out that some of the groups in SRA that are further ahead will simply continue on as usual. So when hearing this I had a reaction. The point initially I see is in relation to “falling behind” and that those that are “further ahead” are “more advanced” and are thus “from my perspective” “not equal” meaning they have an advantage in understanding the material. And so here a point of comparison is coming up where I “want to be the best” where I “want to be ahead with the advanced group” why? Because I perceive that they are getting “more support” and thus will Self-Realize quicker. Or just overall, more effective and aware and directive in process. So I see that within this point I am “wanting support” as one of the “Key reactive points” was this point of them getting “more support” Ok so am seeing a point of inferiority here as well, where I am seeing myself as “less-than” those that are able to move on and keep working on SRA. Particularly working with Resonances. I have been wanting to start working with the Resonances because the support one receive through this process is always very cool, though my starting point for ‘Wanting’ this is simply just that – It is “A Want” where in I am limiting myself by “holding myself down” from the perspective of “wanting to, or waiting for” the Resonances to “tell me what is going on with me” and that I perceive that I can get ‘better assistance’ from than, than I can give to myself. I also see here the correction which is simply pushing myself to support myself and push me to go deeper and deeper into self and will myself into and effective application of self support and self investigation where I direct myself to uncover me and no more accept and allow myself “wait around” for Bernard or Resonances to “give direction” from the perspective of placing these two points in my world as “the ultimate points” and there in accepting and allowing myself to stand “less than” these two points, instead of me simply “walking into the unknown” where I push and develop ways to support me that I have not yet explored, where in I actually really investigate me, and get to know myself, and realize that I am able to actually effectively support myself with just me alone though my own self directed self willed application. This Reaction I Had was also in relation to “my ability” to do Muscle Communication, and I can see also that I ran into a bit of a snag with the last few points on my most recent SRA lessons with Leila as my buddy, and so went into a point of fearing, when hearing this point today, that I am not effective enough in Muscle Communication and thus I would be “held back” and go back and do the 6 months of Mind Constructs. I also “see myself” as ‘struggling’ with the Resonance Work, like “my foundation” is not stable, so here am actually seeing me in the future on chat with resonances and them asking me to test a point and I “am lost” Ok so seeing a memory here now wanting to emerge out of the darkness about school. Like the experience one have in school where you simply do not know the answers, and are left “feeling lost” and have no grounding. And so in this Future Projection I am on chat with resonances and they are asking me to test some information and I am struggling and fumbling and it is clear that I am not prepared and they are waiting for me but seeing that I am “just trying to keep up” and not effectively prepared. Shit this is quite a specific projection, though am not seeing a specific memory that this related to, simply the ‘general memory’ of how this “type of experience” would be one that one would have in school or something like this. Though also seeing a point of “Hockey” coming up here, where I used to go to Hockey Schools and Camps, and some of them were “more competitive” and really preparing you to play in competitive hockey and so I would “step into these” scenarios where I felt a bit “out of place” as everything was moving so fast and I was there “just trying to keep up” and so there was always allot happening on the ice, and players going everywhere and coaches shouting out orders, and particularly if this was a “new team” or “situation” I would really have to focus on ensuring that I “understood” each point clearly, as the coaches made it clear that if you do not understand how to do the drill – Don’t Go! And this meant you go to the back of the line and basically get a “black mark” on your name as they see you “did not understand what they say” Fuck this was a pressure cooker experience. And so you would watch the players ahead of you run through the drill, and you would focus intently on them and observe what you were supposed to do, and then it was your turn and Fuck you better get it right, and so the drill would begin and you (I) would “give it my all” as often you were doing tryouts, or even just “trying out” all the time, as to “earn more ice time” or when I would be “trying to make a team” Quite a stressful experience. So this projection of me with resonances on chat is similar to this Hockey Experience, where I see me on chat and experience myself to “have lost it” meaning just can’t get a grasp on anything, and experiencing me as not having a handle on the information and also see the point of “letting them down” when there is that moment where they realize that “I am out of my league” Ok this phrase is specific here this being “out of my league” as this definitely bring up the point of inferiority and just not being good enough. Ok so the point coming through here is “Not being good enough” though I will explore now some other aspects of my reaction to this point of now the point being open of “going back to do 6 months of mind constructs” I am seeing myself as unworthy in Muscle Communication, and thus also in process, as the point with MC simply indicate that I am “missing some points” and that this will cause me to “fall back” into my “rightful place” – So here again the point of inferiority. What is interesting also is wanting to be up with the advanced group, wanting to be in the “in crowd” wanting to be ahead of the game and leading, but specifically this point of wanting to in the “in crowd” Its like the point of starting out with a group of people and then you all walk together, and as you walk the “group separates” and starts to split up based on skill and potential and ability, and I end up “falling back” based on my skill and get separated from “my friends” I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into reaction with regards to the new SRA course structure. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to “not know” what I should do. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to “exist within a state of doubt and uncertainty” by allowing myself to exist within a point of “not knowing” I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I really “do not know” I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge and define myself according to where I am in my SRA course, and within doing this “make decisions” based on strengthening my personality which I have created as “who I am within how I have defined me within my SRA course” instead of making a decision that is based on actual practical self support and doing what is best for all. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear going back and doing 6 month of Mind Constructs, as I fear getting stuck behind. I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as superior to others who are further back in SRA. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to “lock into” my personality, instead of stopping all personality and ego, and remaining here as breath as Self Support. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get caught up in personalities within supporting me and in doing this “forget about me” altogether and never actually get to a place of me as the starting point of my direction within self support. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to “lock into” a point of fear with regards to me not being prepared for the next Resonance section of SRA. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to based my decisions, and make my decisions from a point of energy and reaction, instead of from a point of self honesty and self support where I allocate myself within the equation and simply look at the common sense of the point and what would be most effective as a point of support. It is not about “who your friends are” I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to determine and define my application in relation to “whos around me” which is indicating that I am not yet standing equal to each and every one in process and more specifically I am not yet standing as the starting point of my world where it does not matter where I am, but that I am constant, consistent, the same in my application in each and every point that I stand. Thus I see this point of me being the starting point of myself within process, within my application, and within self support, where it does not matter where I am, and who I am with, as I support me the same where ever I am and not longer accept and allow me to limit me within my self support from the perspective of believing that I must be in “advanced groups” to have effective self support but rather it does not matter where I am within what group or what level, I decide that I am the director of me and that I support me effectively and do not accept me to limit my potential self support, and thus from this perspective I am always the source of how effective I am within process, not who is around me or supporting me. This is actually a cool point that is emerging and that has been coming up over the last few days, where I am starting to see the point of not limiting myself in “what I am capable in” meaning “I take the reins” so to speak, and start pushing myself to support myself and expand my application, and ways I support me. And push me to become more specific in how I support me, and as well in my writing. No one is going to walk process for us. We must walk process, and we are the ones that determine “the pace” we move, though I do not see it as a point of rushing, but rather a point of inevitability where one will decide to be more effective within application, and that “this decision” can be done now or later. Ok slowing down a bit here, I really “rattled through” that mid section. Ok so I did react to this SRA point. I was even discussing this point with Marlen on Chat and experienced my writing to immediately tense up, as I tensed up inside and became more ridged which I identified as a point of “Mind” as I started to explain and talk about the SRA Re-structuring. And how I “did not know what I would do” I want to simply continue on as is. Particularly because now I have just started into doing more MC and see this as a point which I would simply like to direct. I have struggled with this point of MC and so am finding within the new lessons that because there is much MC going on that it is a cool platform for me to actually stabilize the point. And so from this perspective would like to continue moving with the lessons where I am now. On the other hand, 6 months of Mind Constructs would be fucking awesome, though I see that I would still not be directing this point of MC which is “the point” so to speak, which I would like to direct, and am in the process of doing so.

ALL are Walking DEAD – Not One is Alive.

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So today I am re-organizing a few things. Yesterday I gave notice to “my job” at the Horse Ranch that I would no longer be working there. So today basically starting again with looking for work in this world, in this system, and looking at various ways of generating an income for myself in this world. So also looking at how to utilize my skills within Visual Art to do this, thus also starting with some promotion and research into graphic design, illustration and things like this. Partly because after my last experience working “for others” the question came up of “how long I am going to do this for”, meaning, work “for other people”. I mean the principle in itself is fine, working with others so to speak, though into today’s world and economic system money and self interest is now bread so Deep within the human being, that to “work for another” is in most cases “to become a slave” to those with money who will pay you. There is actually no regard, consideration, or insight into what is actually here on this earth as a System which support the creation of a malicious, deceptive, self interested human being. Money is Power and those with Money use it as such, and simply justify their existence with money and their ability to control others by paying them. I mean who cares what you really do Actions are irrelevant – Actions have become irrelevant Not body gives a fuck about what they are doing What they are concerned with is “How much money do they get” Our Actions within this world are Not in Alignment with Living in and Equilibrium with Earth. We are so fucking blinded by money that one is unable to see that their current day to day actions are actually harming the earth, harming themselves, and others, This all gets “sideswiped” when “the cheque comes in” which allow someone to justify what they do. And in a way “see nothing wrong with it”. Humanity is BLIND. Which allows an individual to justify abusing the earth, themselves, and others. As long as they get paid, or turn a profit. I am also busy today filing out forms for “repayment assistance” on my student loan which I ‘signed’ when I was 19 years old. 10 years later and I have not paid a single dollar back on the loan, even though I have made hundreds of dollars a year in payments on the interest so that I “don’t fall behind” I mean this process alone that I am currently busy with in filing out these forms reveal “the state of this world” the “state of the system” that we as humanity have all collectively participated in. And that we have all allowed, and supported, and created. Thus each one is responsible for how we are currently existing. So I am busy spending time filing out papers so that “I qualify” for re-payment assistance. Processes and Systems that one must ‘spend’ time and attention on, not so they can “live a dignified life”, but so that can “just survive”. Though this is the system we have created, this is the system that I have allowed to exist by doing nothing. By seeing myself as to small, to insignificant, to do anything, not knowing exactly what I should do. And so have allowed this current system to prevail by allowing these excuses and beliefs inside me. And of course, believing that someone else will do it. The younger generation will do it. Those that are qualified will do it. But the fact of the matter is that it is the responsibility of everyone here on this earth to do it. And not simply “leave it someone else” “leave it to some group” while you simply go about living out your life in ignorant bliss. All must stand up and take responsibility for what is here and what we have allowed, and re-educate ourselves so that we can actually each and everyone of us here, support the emergence of a new world. To do nothing, is to simply allow this world to continue existing as it is. I have realized for myself that all must be given an equal opportunity and that it is not about the evolution of self alone amongst the many, attempting to “be all you can be” No. It is about the evolution of ALL, together, where each individual on this earth, Stand as that ALL, and Always, in every moment, act in the best interest of all as the starting point of themselves. To observe what we are doing at desteni from the sidelines and do nothing is deception. Because the truth is – Those who “stand-by” do not actually have a solution for this world. Yet the point is simple in terms of what we are saying. Stop placing yourself before the All. All one has to do is see how they live their lives and see if they are busy working on a solution that considers each and every single human being, plant, and animal on this earth. Or are you just busy with “your own life” Suggest to investigate the Solution Desteni is Presenting – Let go of judgements, and ideas about the point and actually investigate it. Desteni Suggest a World System Based on Equality and What is Best for ALL. And a part of this system will be the Re-Structuring of the Money System. And the elimination of Capitalism and Profit as a System that Governs Humanity and All on the Planet. Where abuse is allowed – where we all have allowed ourselves to “look the other way” at say for example the homeless man on the street or the starving dog in your neighbour hood. I mean do you not find it odd that one is actually not able to “comprehend” the deaths of millions broadcast on the News as casualties of war, where in one moment one can be watching a report on 40 by-standards killed in a suicide bombing then 15 minutes later be watching their favourite entertainment program and have forgotten all about the atrocities actually happening around them in every moment. Desensitized is not even the word to describe it. Obviously this showing that we as human beings are actually really DEAD in this world, the Walking Dead. So suggest to Research the Equal Money System Proposed by Desteni. Because each and everyone of us are responsible for what is Here. And are responsible for ourselves in educating ourselves on the true state of this world – Obviously it is easy to ignore. Interestingly because this world is a chaotic mess, yet we manage to remain oblivious to it. Mind Control. I mean how else can we simply live day to day and think everything is ‘OK’. So Visit www.equalmoney.org and re-educate yourself – pull yourself out of your grave. This life we live is not living – It is Dying, that is plain to see – And fucked-up how people will protect it, like its worth protecting. That is simply ego. So investigate an Equal Money System, a system based on Equality. This will not happen automatically, we must actually, as a Race, Create it. And it will take effort It will require one to re-consider their entire life. Obviously to ignore this is showing that one would rather just live out the rest of their lives placing their lives as that which is important over The Rest of Humanity. If that is not Ego, I don’t know what is. Most are not aware that they exist primarily as the Ego. And think “its normal” to “live your life” and enjoy yourself – Well yes, you are exactly right, it is ‘normal’ for who we have become – for the Walking Dead that we are and have believed ourselves to be. An Equal Money System is “not normal” by today’s standard, as it actually go “against” what we have currently accepted as life, An Equal Money is Based on Life, on Living, on Support of the Earth, on Self Expression, Expansion, Perfection, On a New Way of Living – A way of living that most do not even realize exists or is possible. Thus investigate for yourself and prove to yourself that you are at least willing to consider something “outside” of your bubble of perception which you believe is so magnificent. Its really not magnificent, its actually just suppression, denial, hatred, jealousy, fear, resentment – lol What a Fuck Up. Join us at Desteni in Bringing Forth a Solution for the Fuck-up of a world people are actually unable to see. Thus if you think this world is fine – Than I strongly suggest you research what we are saying at desteni I am One Vote For World Equality and an Equal Money System. www.equalmoney.org www.desteni.co.za

Remaining Silent Caused Harm to Horse – Daily Writing – Nov 5 2010

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Ok, writing out my day Here. An interesting experience happened at work today. This morning as we turned the horses out to their stables I was walking this one horse through this section where there was a cord which the horse and I required to walk over on the way to the stable.   I noticed the cord the day before and saw that it was definitely a hazard which would cause problems if a horse where to get tangled in it.   It simply was a basic point which was not being directed which create an unsafe environment for the animals.   I mean they are quite relaxed on the farm with regards to the care of the horse which is cool in one respect though this also turn into a form a abuse where points within the environment are being neglected. So a point for myself here to see the difference between “being relaxed” and “neglecting ones surroundings” and simply to not accept and allow a merging of the two points where “being relaxed” actually become overlooked for what it is really standing as. Meaning when this turns into a form of neglect must be stopped and not accepted or allowed. Clarity and Specificity are required Here. And are required within this world to actually push ourselves to move towards a more effective human.   Anyways I saw this “cord point” but did not fix it as we were busy with other things, as well as the fact that “ I am new” and have no right to say what I think should be done (self defined belief). Now what I mean by this, is I noticed this point coming up within myself quite a bit where because I am simply learning how everything thing works their, that I can simply not assume that things should be this way or that if I do not have the entire picture. But have noticed many points coming up within regards to points within the environment which are simply not being considered from the perspective of actually creating a safe environment for the animals. Yes the animals are smart and are capable of looking out from themselves, however one of these points which I in a way “allowed within the environment under the idea that I am “still new and is better to not suggest or say anything”  actually today caused quite a disturbance.   As I walked the horse through the area where the cord was, only seconds before I attempted to adjust the cord temporarily so that it would not get hooked up with the horse...as I walked the horse over the cord, sure enough his foot caught the edge of the cord and spooked the horse a bit, then the cord got even more hooked up in the legs of the horse and he totally freaked, and reared up, and then proceeded to drag me around 6 or 8 feet as I simply slid across the gravel on my shoes attempted to stabilize the horse, after a few moments of frantic flailing about the horse settled down, breathing heavily through his nose afterwards he walked with me to his stable and I let him in. This could have been avoided and basically by allowing this cord point I also tacitly allowed and supported this experience that the horse when through, not actually considering the implications that this have on the horse, other possible outflows/consequences of such neglect   So this was an interesting point because here was a practical point which I saw in the environment which is “not cool” for the horses, yet I let it slide, I did not take responsibility for the point but rather, allowed the responsibility to be abdicated to “those in charge” like a kind of “this is their stable, who am I to tell them how to go about it” And the result was a completely unnecessary experience which could have actually injured myself or the horse.   This event illustrating still How I am simply allowing the current system in place to be the dominant system and am not yet standing up as an authority and taking responsibility for what is here.   So here I see that I am still holding back in actually expressing points and taking responsibility for points which I see, and simply standing by the fact that it is not acceptable anymore within this reality to allow such points.   Abuse has become so accepted in our world that we do not even realize anymore that we are abusing. And so I see this point as well, where its not a matter of who is right or wrong, and I to judge is unacceptable from the perspective of seeing many points that must be directed – I mean a few years ago I would not have even noticed and actually this kind of consideration had to be pointed out to me also, so understand how these points can simply not be seen as “important” by beings in this world.   So a re-education process is required.   So the environment is quite cool actually to be able to express myself within practically directing myself to create a safe, stable environment for the Animals. But just wanted to write about that one point which occurred today.   So I have had many of these experiences so far of really at this point, allowing myself to be shown how they do things, even if it is not necessarily how I would do it from the perspective of ensuring the point is directed absolute, but I will compromise myself within these moments and “let it slide” because that’s what they do, and I mean who am I to change things.   This is exactly the point I was writing about a few posts ago about accepting and status quo and just going with what is the established way of doing things, and in a way being to afraid to actually challenge the status quo out of fear of causing friction.   I mean overall the place is pretty cool, it is simply just in some moments there are points not being considered which I can see, so its cool, I simply have the opportunity to bring these points into awareness just the same as they were done for me.   But obviously not to wait on this because today’s experience with the horse showed me that these points that I am seeing are in fact valid.   So from this perspective “give to another what I would want to receive” And explore the point of equality and how I can bring this point to the table so to speak in way which is not being considered.   It will be a long process because fuck, these horses are in small little pens with no grass, some are in nice big field but also some small pens   I wouldn’t want to live in those pens.   Pretty Cool though to see how an equal money system will actually free the animals so to speak, where the conditions where animals lived will no longer be based on making money so will not have to be subjected to these bull shit conditions of enslavement imposed upon them from an ignorant inconsiderate humanity, that see animals as for there own personal gains, not as equals to be treated as such and be free in the exact same way as humans.     I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give permission to this system of abuse that is currently here have president and authority simply because it is here.   I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to actually stand up for life and what is best for all and actually start to walk this process within my immediate environment.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support this current system of abuse and self interest instead of what is best for all.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear standing up and saying something out of fear of friction.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I will be met with resistance and not then know what to say.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold back in speaking out of fear of being yelled at or argued with where in my point will not be herd and I will end up feeling embarrassed.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed fear to be my god, my authority, and that which I use to direct the choices and decisions I make and words I speak and do not speak.   I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to simply merge into what is here as this current system instead of actually standing up and not more accepting and allowing myself to “go along with it” because I do not want to “disrupt or upset” someones world.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider other peoples worlds from the perspective of not wanting to cause ripples in other peoples perfect worlds, even if those worlds are not what is best for all. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support self interest instead of what is best for all.   I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to simply go along with this world, out of fear of setting off other peoples egos.